


b

by Cear_IK



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Artificial Intelligence, Canon Typical Violence, Foul Language, Gen, Minor Character Death, Multiple AIs, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Vigilantism, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-28
Updated: 2019-03-28
Packaged: 2019-11-15 12:22:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18073313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cear_IK/pseuds/Cear_IK
Summary: Sans and Papyrus move into a duplex about a year after everyone reaches the Surface. However, their neighbor is rude, grumpy, and definitely NOT named Bailey like she told them when she introduced herself. Despite being lied to, Sans isn't quite sure what to make of his prickly, pushy, insincere, yet almost aggressively kind and hard-working neighbor.Meanwhile, a lone-wolf vigilante is taking the various mobs in the city by storm. Nicknamed "Blade" by both cops and criminals for their habit of leaving a hiltless knife at the scene of their work, they've laid down a new law in their territory: No murdering innocents. Monster or not. And the mobs, already disliking Blade's various other moral rules, are now actively displeased.Inspired by "Shattered Plates" by cutiepiejane (which no longer exists, I think) and the movie "Accountant".Critiquing is sought after.Re-write of the first fic I started on here back in 2016, titled "Little b".





	b

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Little b](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8698477) by [Cear_IK](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cear_IK/pseuds/Cear_IK). 



> I always intended to finish "Little b." Going on three years later, I'm going to damn well try. I have no idea where this is going - that's one of the things I intend to figure out ahead of time this go-round - but come hell or high water, I'll do my best to get there. b deserves that after hanging in limbo for this long. I'm going to try to post once a month. It'll be hard - all good things are - because I'll have to push through a lot of bullshit, a good chunk of it my own. I... tend to exist, instead of living.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first several chapters are going to seem like a simple re-post of the original work, especially this first one. However, the farther we get, the more divergent the chapters will become from their predecessors, until we eventually get to chapters that have no predecessors to begin with. Sorry for the slow pace and the repetition though.

**9:00 am**

  
Eyes pop open. The human stayed still, their heart beating swiftly as they silently tried to identify what startled them awake.

  
Fight or Flight?

  
The sound came again, identified as loud shouting, barely muffled by the dividing wall of the duplex. Oh. The new neighbors move in today.

 

>   
>  Fight

 

  
The boisterous voice continued as the human pulled on a robe and slipped on their slippers. They didn't plan on staying out for long, and - once the decibel level had been lowered - they planned on possibly (hopefully) going back to sleep. If only for an hour.

  
When they walked out their door, they saw a tall skeleton - _he must be close to seven feet_ they mused - berating a shorter one. Loudly. Not particularly strange, since monsters had been out for about a year.

  
The boxes tell them that yes, these monsters are indeed their new neighbors. The sheer volume of the tall one tells them that no, these monsters may not be their neighbors for long.

  
The tall one notices them first.

  
"HUMAN! IT IS A PLEASURE TO MEE-"

"Shut up." The coldness in their quiet voice cut through his loud one. The shorter of the two skeletons stiffened. "I apologize for how blunt I am about to be, but frankly, you woke me up, and I wake up cranky, so here are the rules: until the soundproofing in the dividing wall is installed in about a week, no shouting before half-past ten in the morning."

  
"or what? not like we can be ar **rest** ed for being loud." The sonorous, slightly aggressive voice came from behind them, and they startled, whipping around half-way so they could see both skeletons and put their back to the wall. They had been aware that they had somehow lost track of the shorter skeleton while they were talking to the taller one, but they weren't aware of how he could have snuck up on them. They were incredibly difficult to sneak around.

  
"You are correct," they replied, now speaking to the angry shorty. "However, I would appreciate the courtesy of it because not everyone has a diurnal schedule. As for consequences..." They smiled, somehow managing to look even more unfriendly and cold than they sounded. "I know the owner." The shorter skeleton scowled, while the taller one watched the other two with a worried expression.

  
"so what?" the cranky skeleton snarled. "just 'cuz we woke you up from your beauty rest, that gives you the right to snap at my bro and threaten us? or is the volume the true **bone** of contention here?"

  
"BROTHER!" the tall skeleton exclaimed. The human simply sighed.

  
"I understand why you may suspect me of being secretly racist, but I truly only have an issue with the volume, seeing as I've only had..." They paused to think for a moment. "Well, you woke me up around nine, so let's round up and say three and a half, four hours of sleep, and by this time, I have to be awake in far less than an hour, so it's not like I can get much more rest."

  
"I'M SO SORRY HUMAN!" taller gushed, interrupting the skeleton he'd called 'brother' before the shorter could actually say anything. "I APOLOGIZE FOR WAKING YOU AND FOR SANS' RUDENESS! I AM THE GREAT PAPYRUS! AND HE IS MY LAZYBONES BROTHER SANS!" The newly named Sans scowled, watching her distrustfully. The 'Great Papyrus' held out a hand to shake enthusiastically, but the human declined to shake it, preferring to incline her head towards each brother politely instead.

  
"Namaste, Great Papyrus. Greetings, Sans. Welcome to 21b Baker Street. I hope you enjoy your stay, and that the soundproofing arrives in a timely manner, for your sakes as well as mine. My apologies Papyrus, but you do not strike me as a naturally quiet person. Perhaps the owner can expedite- that soundproofing should help with our neighborly relationship..." Their voice trailed off consideringly. "What time is it?"

  
"uh..." The two brothers shared a look for a moment. "just about nine-thirty," Sans rumbled reluctantly. The human sighed and rubbed their hands over their face in a weary gesture.

  
"Definitely no more chance to sleep, then." They brightened with obviously false cheer. "Well then! This was a less than auspicious beginning. Perhaps we should arrange to meet later in a more cordial environment. I, however, have errands I need to prepare for. I may as well start early since I'm up in any case."

  
"THAT'S ALRIGHT HUMAN! PERHAPS YOU COULD JOIN MY BROTHER AND ME FOR MY FAMOUS FRIENDSHIP SPAGHETTI FOR DINNER!" Sans looked irritated at the suggestion.

  
"we shou-"

"Again, I must apologize Papyrus, but I won't be able to attend," they replied with a sideways look at Sans to let him know that _they_ knew they weren't really invited. "Sadly, I have work." Sans snarled in disbelief.

  
"OH... UNTIL WHEN? MAYBE WE CAN MEET AFTER YOUR WORK?" Sans' eyesockets narrowed as he noticed the humans' weight shift uncomfortably at his bro's question.

  
"Five," they said abruptly. "I stop working at five." Sans' eyesockets narrowed even further, his scowl deepening.

  
"THEN WHY WOULD YOU STILL BE WORKING DURING DINNER...?" Papyrus asked, confused, trailing off when the human started shaking their head.

  
"Not five in the afternoon, Papyrus." Sans' eyesockets began to widen, seeming to realize what they meant even before they completed what they were saying. "I stop working at five in the morning." The human had a hard time believing that the younger skeleton's look of surprise wasn't exaggerated.

  
"oh," he said in a small voice, clearly shocked. Maybe not so exaggerated, then.

  
"Yes 'oh,'" they sighed, looking slightly amused. "Maybe I'll be able to join you for brunch sometime, though." Despite his own shock, Sans still seemed irritated by the idea of his new neighbor eating with his bro and him, no matter what time of day it was. The human visibly collected themselves before inclining their head at each of the brothers again. "Well then, if you'll excuse me, I must start my day." They turned, stepping delicately around a surly Sans to make their way back inside their half of the building.

  
"WAIT!" Papyrus called out before they could close their door. "YOU KNOW THE NAMES OF THE GREAT PAPYRUS AND HIS BROTHER SANS, BUT WHAT SHOULD WE CALL YOU?" The human pushed their door back open and seemed to think for a moment before their face lit up in an amused smile.

  
"You may call me Bailey," she said.

* * *

 

**9:45 am**

  
Sans scowled at the closed door, his brother gushing about their new neighbor behind him. That human had taken far too long to think of a name, and she seemed awfully amused with herself when she finally did. There was no way her name was real. And he didn't trust her near-constant faint smile- it reminded him of his own permagrin, and that was as real as her name. _Bailey_. What was so amusing about that name anyway?

  
"URGH! SANS, ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME AT ALL?!"

  
"sure bro" Sans replied with an easy grin.

  
"THEN WHAT DID I JUST SAY?" the younger skeleton asked skeptically.

  
"what did i just say?"

  
"SANS!" Papyrus exclaimed in frustration. Sans just grinned. ~~Torturing~~   _Teasing_ his bro was one of his few guilty pleasures in life, he had to admit. Not that he'd ever admit that out loud.

  
"SANS! MOVING WILL TAKE FOREVER IF YOU DON'T HELP! YOU CAN'T NAP IF THE COUCH ISN'T SET UP, LAZYBONES!" Sans chuckled.

  
Damn, his Lil' Bro really was the best.

* * *

 

**9:45 am**

  
'Bailey' sighed, leaning against the closed door behind her. Those skeletons were going to give her problems. The tall one - Papyrus - appeared to be an absolute innocent cinnamon bun. It made it hard to stay angry at him, even short on sleep as she was. She didn't think he'd be able to keep the volume down, even for just a week. Such a damn shame.

  
The other skeleton - Sans - though... He worried Bailey. He was too observant, too suspicious, and no one had ever been able to sneak up on her before. She didn't blame him for being suspicious of her, but his perceptive nature was going to be a problem for her. Maybe she should... _encourage_ the two skeletons to move somewhere else. But if they relocated away from her, did they have anywhere else to go? She didn't think the monsters would have rented her duplex if they had had a choice, particularly since the duplex was situated on the border between the good and bad parts of town. Really, the only good things about the duplex were how close to the business district it was... and its' owner. Few tenants had stayed long enough to discover the latter benefit though. Attracted by the relatively low rent, they were driven off by their new neighbor- her. If she didn't succeed in driving them off, the owner would at her 'request'. She hadn't yet found a housemate she could live with, and she doubted that the loud and suspicious skeletons would last either. But if not housemates with her... then where? Maybe she could 'talk' with the owner about starting the soundproofing earlier... She snorted at her own joke.

* * *

 

**10:03 pm**

  
Gait dragging, feet hurting, smelling like butter, the human shuffled up the steps of the duplex's shared porch. Ten hours of constant customer service wore them out. Ten hours of constant customer service standing on their feet completely wiped them out. Yet their night wasn't even half over.

  
"early night?" The human inhaled deeply, asking for patience, then exhaled before turning around. The smaller skeleton - Sans - was standing on the monster's side of the porch, watching her. "i thought you don't stop working until five in the morning?"

  
"I don't." 'Bailey' flashed him her best customer service smile (the type that was only ever used on belligerent people one had to be polite to) before quickly fleeing through her door. Leaning back against the cool wood, she took a moment to groan in relief. Despite the crowd being light at the theater that day, it had been a long day, and several unruly patrons more than made up for the dearth in customers, stress-wise. She did not need a smart-aleck too-observant skeleton adding to her problems. Bailey checked her watch. Twenty minutes. Sighing, she started toward her room to begin preparing for her next job, stripping as she did so.

* * *

 

**10:28 pm**

  
Sans scowled at the door his neighbor had disappeared behind little more than twenty minutes ago. She had looked so... _worn,_  so he could understand not wanting to hang with his energetic bro after work (and she did work rather late), but she didn't have to tell such... such an _exaggerated_ lie. Ten in the evening was nowhere near five in the morning and-

  
His thoughts were cut off when the door he was glaring at reopened. Only, instead of seeing the worn and weary youth that had dragged themselves in the door, a stunning, undeniably female beauty glided out of the door.

  
"..." Sans rubbed his eyesockets. He had been up longer than he probably should have himself, so perhaps he was hallucinating. It wouldn't have been the first time.

 

Nope.

 

When he looked again, she was still there. And now she was looking at him.

  
"What are you still doing out here, Sans?" she asked, quirking an eyebrow at him. She waited for a beat before sighing softly. "Take a picture, it lasts longer." Although her tone was sharp, her expression betrayed her amusement. Sans realized his jaw as gaping and promptly shut it with a click.

  
"...how...?" She held up one perfectly manicured hand, shushing him.

  
"Remember Sans, I'm still on the clock. However, it would be bad for both of us - me especially - if we were seen together. My next clients can be a bit... vindictive, and I need this job. So is there any way you could hide from the prejudiced pricks, please?" The smile on her face was kind and gentle, amiable even. The only indicator of her true emotion was the cold, cutting tone she let slip when describing her 'clients.' Sans narrowed his eyesockets at her before slowly pulling his hood up and stuffing his hands in his pockets. With his eyelights dimmed, his face covered and in the shadows, his body hidden by his clothes, he could pass for human, albeit a short one.

  
And just in time, too. Sans watched a limo pull up in front of the duplex.

  
"Well then Sans, perhaps I'll see you tomorrow. Good night and deep rest." 'Bailey's' voice was deep and melodious, much more feminine than her usual voice- or at least the voice she used with him before. It didn't really fit with his image of 'Bailey'- but it did fit this beautiful and graceful version of her. She almost floated down the steps of the porch and across the lawn, inclining her head to him in passing. Damnit, he needed to figure out what she meant when she did that... or anything else about her. Clearly, anything she showed him or the rest of the world was a fake, a mask to hide her true self.

  
He of all people should know.

  
Sans watched her stop by the passenger window of the limo and speak with the person in the seat before accepting an envelope of something from them. He watched her get into the back as the window rolled back up, and watched as the limo smoothly pulled away from the curb, carrying the woman in it to meet 'clients' she clearly detested... No... He can't get a good read on his new neighbor. She is an enigma and a mystery all wrapped into one, and he doesn't trust that. He doesn't trust _her_.

  
But...

  
Maybe she really did work hard. Her words, her actions, her tone all indicated that getting all dolled up and into that limo wasn't the start of 'fun times.' She had called them _clients_. Sans wasn't naive, nor was he stupid, and it was pretty easy to make the connection. An 'escort' then, and if the limo and the quality of the clothes (and the lady herself) were any indications, a high-class escort at that... Probably the type only the rich, politicians, or the rich politicians were able to hire... Sans didn't like being near someone who rubbed elbows with such people, and he was relatively sure that 'Bailey' didn't like it either. But she had said she needed the job...

  
Upset, and unsure of exactly why ~~he didn't need to care about a stranger, especially one who was rude to his bro~~ , Sans teleported into his bedroom, landing on his bare mattress, staring at the ceiling and waiting for sleep to take him.

 

 

When Sans stumbled into the living room the next morning, Papyrus was in the kitchen making breakfast spaghetti. Sans plopped himself on the couch and turned the TV on, catching the news in the middle of a story.

 

 

 

> _"-these men, suspected of being members of a local gang, were apprehended last night and now reside in police custody. The police released a statement indicating that they have obtained evidence linking the men to the dusting of an icecap and the attempted dusting of a fire elemental last week. The men are facing charges of murder and attempted murder and will be due in court next week. The statement made no mention of any involvement of the vigilante. Now for the weather with-"_

 

 

Sans stared. Well. That was new.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of you may have noticed what was happening with the pronouns. Well, before anyone gets upset, there is an explanation.
> 
> b is gender fluid. As 'b,' they prefer as little identifiers as possible- neutral clothes, neutral pronouns, etc. - but when they are using a name, they prefer the pronoun they associate with that name. For example, you'll see 'they/them' switch to 'she' when b chooses the name 'Bailey.' So far there have been more 'female' names than 'male' names, but that is both because as a character, b prefers female names in most situations (females are less likely to fall under suspicion and more likely to be underestimated), and as a writer _I_ am far more comfortable writing as a biological female. As both b and I expand our repertoire, we may see more 'male' pronouns pop up.  
> In fact, b has always been genderfluid, I just wasn't confident enough as a writer to write them that way. If you ever see a pronoun that seems wrong for that particular name, or if you have any advice about writing gender-deviant characters, please share! b is my first ever gender-deviant, and I'm always looking for constructive criticism.  
> If you see any grammar or spelling issues, please please please tell me. They drive me nuts and **I always find them**.


End file.
